a beautiful rose

Our family has had a rough couple of weeks with my parents car accident and the news that my grandmother had cancer. I flew down to VA Saturday morning, visited with her and my family and by Sunday morning she had passed. I am sad in many ways and for many reasons, but I am so angry at infertility and how it prevented me from having a baby while she was alive. We officially started the adoption process last year on her 85th birthday when we mailed our application off to Florida. I really really wanted her to share in the joy when we finally became a family. I never told her that we plan on using her name, Rose, as our child's middle name. I hate that I didn't say anything, actually we have kept our names to ourselves. I guess I figured she would be here to see it for herself. So Grandma, if you can read this, please know I love you very much. I know that you are with my little angel now.